Failing at being a wife……

Today I failed as a wife…………………………….
My husband,whom has worked a lot of hours this past month, just wanted to spend some quality alone time tonight and I shunned him. Instead he is off in the bedroom watching a movie, and I am out here writing my blog.

It doesn’t seem right………

But of course I justify my actions because I have been up since 7 am this morning, running the household alone, while everyone else got to sleep in and take relaxing times today. The baby has been extra fussy and wants to be held more, the 2 and 3 year old are louder than usual—and blah, blah, blah,–I am exhausted and just want to crawl into bed alone and take a long nap.

So I sulk In my head, knowing that I am in the wrong for what I am justifying. I think to myself no other wife does ALL the work like I do. I compare and contrast different husband and wife situations and where is it getting me?

Further away from my husband and God.

Ephesians 5:22
Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.

I need to remember that it does not matter what I think is “fair” in my life. Jesus Christ did not get treatly fairly in his life. Most godly people, taking a stand for Christ are not treated fairly in their lives. If I believe wholeheartedly that God is in control of my life and that all of these “unfair acts” are necessary tools to mold and make me be a better person then I need to take my cross and bear it. I need to realize that I will keep failing in my duties as a wife and mother if I succumb to these lies and temptations. I need to quit these self pity thoughts and move onward.
What do I do from here? I ask for forgiveness. I admit I am a failure and I get back up again and change my attitude for tomorrow. I go above and beyond my duties as a wife to show my husband that I do love and care for him deeply. I apologize for being in a fleshy mood.

…………………onward to another day, another chance at redemption