The change:  Lowering your voice

In our home, there are lots of little children.  There is much crying, whining, and loudness just because there are so many tiny ones.  It seems there is someone who is always thirsty, grumpy, had a toy taken away, or just feels like exerting their voice.  It can be very loud.  I have in the past resorted to yelling to make sure that people hear me.  The problem with that, is that sometimes I would “lose it” and yell because I was angry. For most of the time it was not  pleasant, just loud.  I was not liking this mother that “lost it” occasionally, I wanted to change.

While visiting the Amish homes, I never noticed a Mother yell at her child to come to her.  In fact, most of the time they talked quite quietly to their children.  It seems their children were “on alert” to hear Mom’s voice and respond when she wanted them.  I was liking that.

Why make the change:

When you have to yell to  get people’s attention, it shows a lack of control.  It seems we “yell” to get our children to listen.  Like,” Ah oh!! Mom really means it this time because she is yelling.”  But what we need to be doing is training our children to listen always, so that you do not have to “resort” to yelling.

Yelling shows a spirit that is out of control.  It shows that we have complete chaos in our life. It is a sign of stress and fatigue.   If you yell to get someone’s attention in the home more than likely your child will do it too.  We want to create a peaceful haven for our homes.  A place where it is warm and inviting, not loud and chaotic.  The first way to do that is to make it a calmer atmosphere.  So how do we do that?

How do we do that:

I know that in our home, the first day that I did this, it didn’t matter.  My children were still loud.  Meals were loud and it was unbearable to all sit in the same “echo” dining room.  I resorted to raising my voice to tell them to be quieter.  Sounds funny, you raise the voice and be the example but meanwhile they are not supposed to be loud?!!?!?!?  Are you seeing a bad pattern here?

What I do is the complete opposite—-I lower my voice, almost to a whisper.  The first day I did this my children thought I was weird.  The second day, they stopped and started to “tune” into what i was trying to speak to them in my whisper voice.

By the third day, I was quietly correcting them to talk quieter.  Meals suddenly became enjoyable.  As we were sitting around the table eating, and as the “louder” child started to speak, I quietly and gently reminded them to lower their voices.  I had to do it a few times, but for the most part they are learning to be quieter.

The baby will make loud baby noises and I will immediately turn to him and let him know that we do not scream like that.  It is a quick discipline not done way after, immediately I let him know it is not acceptable.  Do you know we can sit through a whole meal together without having too much chaos?  It is actually nice to sit down and eat dinner together.  But ask me that 7 months ago and I would tell you that I didn’t sit down with them, I stood as a waitress would quickly answering all of their beck and calls:)  No more, Mom sits and eats with them.

Pay attention to your “triggers.”  What “sets you off” to start yelling.  Maybe it is a teenage child who doesn’t do their homework first.  Maybe it is your little ones as they make a mess over and over in your home.  Whatever the “trigger” is be prepared next time.  Talk with your teenager before hand and let them know what you expect out of them as far as doing their school work.  Baby proof your home to avoid messes all day long.  There are many avenues of change you can make to help “destress” your life and make it more peaceful.  See the trigger, spot it, and then remove it.

Don’t get me wrong, I do still “yell” across my home to maybe call a child to come out to where I am at.  But what I have done away with is the raising of my voice.  I don’t want my chidlren to see me stressed out.  The perfect way to that is by lowering it.  I can be a much happier Momma who doesn’t need to get her “angry eyebrows” out and yell at her children.    I want them to remember me as a Mom that didn’t yell but instead was gentle in her speech.

The change: Eating breakfast

This might sound strange to some and not so strange to others.  If you don’t already know it, breakfast is probably your most important meal of the day.  After waking up in the morning your body has been “fasting” food for the last 12 hours.  If you skip a meal and wait to eat until lunchtime your body is deprived of those nutrients and energy. When you goto eat your next meal, your body holds onto those nutrients longer because it has been denied them so long.  Instead of burning off and using the energy to make you feel better, it simply is trying to undo the denial damage you have done to your body.

Why make the change:

Eating breakfast is important for 3 reasons:

• It Revs up Your Metabolism

Eating breakfast is a great way to “kickstart” your metabolism for the day.  When your body gets food in the morning, it tells your brain to “get going” and this makes your metabolism start working for the day.  When you don’t have breakfast, your body thinks that it needs to conserve its energy because it isn’t getting any more through nutrition.  This can actually slow down your metabolism which will result in burning less calories.

•   It Keeps You in a Good Mood

By eating breakfast in the morning and No, coffee doesn’t count, does a number of things to help your mood stay bright for the day.

1. Since your body won’t be starving, it is easier to get in a good mood and stay that way.
2. Provides plenty of needed energy to help you get through regular tasks for your day–which in turn can make your mood optimistic.
3. Helps regulate your blood sugar through lunch time, which plays a huge role in your mood.

• It Keeps You from binge eating

By not eating breakfast in the morning may save your some calories for the moment, but it sets you up for failure for the rest of your day.  When you deny your body food, you start feeling hungry and grumpy early in the day.  By the time lunch rolls around, you are more than likely going to choose something high in fat and calories to satisfy your food cravings, because you feel so ravenous.  If you can hold off through dinner without eating, chances are you will feel an overwhelming urge to snack all night, which will in turn pack on the pounds.

 

How do we do that:

When I was visiting the Amish homes, these women would get up early and make large complete breakfasts for their family.  Most would consist of oatmeal, eggs, toast, and fruit.  It was simple and basic but a good filling meal.  I didn’t notice many cereal boxes strewn about the table.

I know my self personally, have had many babies over the last 7 years and breakfast time is not a good time for me.  I had to do something quick and easy.  So I came out with feeding my children cheerios everyday.  It served its purpose, I was able to feed many of them quickly.  But by the time an hour and a half went by they were already ready for a snack.

I have since made a resolution to start feeding my children oatmeal everyday for breakfast.  It takes just about the same amount of time and is far better for them then boxed cereal.  And do you know what?  I can feed them breakfast and then they don’t even eat until lunchtime–3 hours later.  Sometimes the 1 year old will get a small snack but for the most part they make it until lunch time.

For my own self, I never ate breakfast.  When I was pregnant, I would force myself to have something.  Usually toast and yogurt.  But it was not something I enjoyed.  I still today could go without it, but I choose to eat it because I see how much better I feel throughout my day.  When I started my weight loss.  I started eating oatmeal everyday for breakfast.  I have the way that we make it in our home here.  This has been a great filler for me.  I originally started out eating a large bowl to help satisfy my hunger, but have since moved to a small one now.

I am amazed at how much quicker I am able to lose weight and keep it off by eating this breakfast.  It is is a plain and simple food that fills you up quickly.

For someone that doesn’t eat breakfast I would recommend starting small.  I use to get sick feeling after eating breakfast as my body was not used to it.  Start small, a muffin or a piece of fruit.  Move up to cold cereal—choose a plainer kind with less ingredients.  Try oatmeal, I promise anyone can get used to any flavor it just takes time:)  Smoothies are a great thing to make and take—we like these in the summer.  Yogurt and fruit sauce are another good choice.

I would save the bacon and eggs for a treat.  The eggs I would do, but for myself that takes more time.  I used to hardboil some and then chop them up on toast and sprinkle some cheese on top for a good protein filled breakfast while pregnant.  Skip any kind of processed foods or high in fat foods.  Think plainer, more basic foods.  A great on the go breakfast is a banana.

Remember start small, gradually move up each day to something with sustenance.  Take note of how your mood is for the day, how much less you eat in a day, and maybe how you have lost a few pounds.

Eating breakfast is another way to help change your life to a life of peace and balance.  Making it a simple lifestyle change.

Read breakfast a good start to your day from our home economics curriculum

Is this for you?  Try it for a week, see how you feel—keep it going if you like the results.