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I never thought much about the realities that large families face when trying to raise their “large brood.” When my husband and I chose to have a large family, we just did it. We didn’t give it much thought, we just knew that we enjoyed them. Somehow, somewhere, with the Lord’s help we manage and life if fun.

But I have become reminded more that our “normal” is NOT the normal of most families. I just take things for granted and think it is just the way it is, but in reality, most people never get to experience the things that we do.

The first thing that is noticeable different is the NOISE level. It can be really loud in our household. Things have gotten much quieter over the years, but I remember years that there was always a baby crying or a toddler throwing a fit or just children being loud through play.

I think that maybe we watch and read too many unreal books and movies with large families and we look at what is put out and it seems that all the children are peaceable and quiet. No one throws fits, everyone is happy, the children are quiet and life is good. But NO!!! Life is not like that. The reality is, that children cry, a 2 year old is going to throw a fit, and I guarantee you that if you have any boys, they will be loudness.

When I had my first 4 children, it was much easier to work one on one and have that “perfectly controlled” obedient child. But when the Lord gave us 6 babies almost one after another, life got crazy. I mean crazy!!! It was loud. Babies cried, toddlers cried, the preschoolers were almost always arguing over a toy, it was rough.
My husband and I would drive out to go run some errands and it was pretty much assumed that someone would start a meltdown in their car seats, for no reason mind you, but it was inevitable. We even had one that would start crying and then put her hands in her mouth and vomit while we were driving!!! Oh my goodness, we tried to keep that one happy while out.*smile

Family trips to make memories, almost always ended in sadness. Someone would meltdown over this, that, or who knows why. I proceeded to take the family photos at the apple orchard, take pictures at the park, and photos while sledding. I have pictures of at least one crying in every photo. What are you going to do? Nothing, I was making a memory.

When you have a household full of little ones, expect it to be loud. Forget about any quiet time, unless it is nap time and normally that is your rest time as well. Play times with lots of little ones is GOING to be loud. That is just reality, lots of little ones equals lots of noise.

Meal times are loud. I gave up for the longest time, because it was just LOUD! I mean LOUD!! You couldn’t even get in a sensible quiet conversation with anyone because it was just that loud. Little children seem to have zero concept of being quieter when confined to a room that doesn’t allow the sound to bounce anywhere but back at you.

BUT………………………….

Do you know what? My children are growing. We CAN drive anywhere, even 18 hours in a vehicle when making a move to another state and have NO MELTDOWNS!!! We pack up our children and do an awful lot of exploring and driving. We sometimes have them sitting for hours while we get to our destination, and we do it!!! MELTDOWN FREE!!!
Dinner times at our table, are enjoyable. It is nice now when our little ones can carry on a conversation about something fun in their day. Sure they tend to raise their voices or multiple ones talk at the same time, but we are a family work in progress. It is getting better and it is fun.

The noise level isn’t that bad anymore. I have found the beauty of headphones and my Blackberry. (smile) I took a lesson from my teenagers who like to walk around at times with their headphones in and I thought to myself, “hmmmm, I am going to try that.” Do you know how nice it is when I am spending some time doing writing, that I can pop in my headphones and listen to music to “drown” out the extra noise? I especially enjoy it, early in the mornings when I listen to my bible teaching. I watch it on my laptop or phone and use my headphones as to not disturb the rest of the household. It is very calming.(smile).

I have even learned the blessing of having them at night. My husband is a light sleeper and I hate to have the television on, if for some reason I am up to disturb him. I started listening to my bible app as I fall asleep and you know that I can STILL hear my children when they wake up. Even if I have trouble falling back asleep, it is nice to just pop in my headphones and restart the sermon I was listening to and drift back asleep without disturbing my husband.

A blessing in something as small as headphones.

Welcome to the series………My Large Family Controlled—-to the best of my physical ability—Chaos—because there is always something. Keep watching for more.

 

part 2

Well our Resurrection Day has come and gone this year.  I did not scrounge the computer for the latest Pinterest  Easter crafts.  We didn’t spend $20 per child for an Easter basket and I won’t have to deal with little ones having meltdowns over sugar highs and lows from eating too much candy.  In fact, it came and went with zero stress because I did not have to “perform” and be the Easter bunny this year.  It is a path I have chosen for a long time.

We enjoyed a wonderful service at church this morning and Jadyn and Lauren participated in a drama.  It was a very powerful and anointed message about breaking every chain, watch it and be blessed.

Back in the days of being a heathen-smile-, we would spend lots of money on having the children’s Easter baskets full.  Most of the candy went to my husband and myself which is never a good thing.  We would spend hours dyeing eggs, only to throw them out.  How many hard boiled eggs can 5 people eat???

When we become Christians, we continued on with the same practice for a few years and then our church ladies group, made Resurrection Eggs.  That was pretty fun, this was before you could buy them inexpensively at the store.

We took an empty egg carton and decorated the cover with cardstock and placed our plastic eggs inside.  We placed the following items in each egg:

• 3 dimes
• a rope
• a stone
• a crown of thorns
• a cloth
• communion cup and bread
• a palm leaf
• dice
• a sword
• a cross
• praying hands
• empty one

We then had bible verses to go with each instance of Jesus death and resurrection.  My children thoroughly enjoyed opening up each egg and then us explaining the meaning of the item.

After having multiple babies and my time limited, I gave up on doing the eggs.  Even just putting together a  special dinner brought upon more stress for myself, I couldn’t even think about doing extra.  I resorted to sharing the story straight from our children’s bible.  Simple and easy.  Through this time, we skipped the whole Easter baskets because sugar and little ones do not mix.  We did things like kites, bubbles, and stryofoam airplanes.  Things Daddy could do with the little ones if the weather permitted.  Some years we did nothing.  My children were still okay, never feeling deprived.

We had that for many years.  Then of course, things get damaged in a household—especially in a large family household–thus I don’t have my resurrection eggs anymore.  I will have to put that on my To Do List…..for one day.

Do we teach our children about the Easter bunny or Santa Claus?  For many years, during the time when we were spiritually growing, we had lots of little ones.  I believe that God just had us weed out doing those types of activities and it happened out of necessity.  We may joke around to our children about Santa Claus, Easter Bunny, and the Tooth fairy, but we don’t make it a point to make them believe that they are real.  Whenever a child looses a tooth, I say in a playful manner, “Oh, go and tell the tooth fairy that you will be needing a dollar tonight!”  The tooth fairy is Dad.

This year I bought some of our children’s favorite candy and on Saturday,divided up a small bowl for each one and said, “come see what the Easter bunny dropped off.”  They smile because they know that I bought the treats.  They enjoyed a sugar filled treat and then I let them run around and finish up with a good brushing of teeth.

We don’t glorify or make much of a deal about it.  But then we don’t try and “hide” the fact that the world has made it about the Easter bunny.  We just say Happy Resurrection Day!  We explain what the day means and my children are like “okay.”  Plain and simple.

Buying the candy was a treat, because I don’t do that.  We also bought a new pack of bubbles, something else we don’t normally do.  We spent the day having dinner.  We made it all on Saturday and then heated it up while we were at church on Sunday.  Came home, had dinner and then went out to enjoy the day.  Our life is spent, doing things with our children.  We celebrate togetherness always!

Here is what we made this year for dinner.  We skipped the traditional ham. We just had a dinner at church and had ordered chicken from our local store, and my husband made the comment that we should have that for Easter dinner.  Normally, I would be slightly offended, but my thought immediately turned to the toxic thinking(remember that?) and I said, “sure we can do that.”  Guess what??  It was one less thing to worry about.

Here was my chicken, heating up in the morning before church.  I heated it at 450 degrees to get it crispy again, then covered it in foil and left it in the oven on 170 for 3 hours.  Our sandwiches I just covered in foil and left them on the stove top and they were still warm for lunch when we got home.

I made some ham and cheese sliders.  The reason being, was I knew that my little ones would have to eat dinner later in the day as well.  I can’t get away with just feeding them once, so I thought the sandwiches would be great for that. 

 

We made macaroni and cheese–the staple for any household celebration.

Baked beans—from a large 10 pound can from Sams Club–just heat and serve.

Green beans–with some bacon bits and french fried onions.  Another no-fuss dish.

Tossed salad—my favorite and macaroni salad—my husbands’ favorite.

My girls were busy making strawberry pretzel dessert and dirt cups.  Something they enjoy doing.

This was a very easy meal to wake up in the morning to and prepare.  I did almost all of the prep the day before, I just heated all of the food on 400 degrees in the morning to get it nice and hot.  I then put the oven on 170 degrees and left it while we were at church.  It was all warm and delicious until we came home 3 hours later.

My ideas over the years about food have changed so much.  I stick to simple and easy and guess what?? My life is stress free. I don’t feel like I need to gorge on all the wonderful dishes only to feel regret the next day.  I keep it light and then it is no big deal.

Does that mean that one day I won’t return to doing Resurrection Eggs? Maybe one day. I know I will continue sharing with my children what the day means.  I will also explain what the world thinks about that day and how it came to be and why Christians have changed it to be about Jesus, as they do Christmas.

I wish I could say, we have matching outfits and the cookie cutter looking family, but ummm unfortunately sometimes we are just good enough all getting out the door dressed, teeth brushed, face washed, breakfast, and on time for church. I didn’t even get a photo of everyone all dressed up.  As soon as we got home, the girls pulled their buns out and the little boys, put on their comfy shorts and tshirts. (smile) that is okay…. Maybe one day……………….