Category Archives: influencing others

Enjoying life with a large family

Posted on 10/23/2013 | 7 comments

My husband recently started a new job, but with starting a new job comes all the stress of being the “new” guy.  My husband is a pretty resilient man, he just usually rolls with all the “cheap shots” geared towards the new guy.  Well, when you have a large white 15 passenger van that you sometimes drive into work, you know the ridicule is going to be magnified.  “Don’t you know how to stop that? or “Wow, really having 10 kids, that’s insane, if my wife wanted me to have that many, I’d divorce her.” or “You really want to go nowhere fast!”

sad….sad….sad…cheap shots made from the world.

One thing that I do know from living life is that when people are uninformed about something, they usually think its a bad idea.  Just because they don’t know any better.

And most people are misinformed about large families.

IMG_0947

My husband is a very wise man when it comes to speaking what he believes.  After enduring some ridicule last week at his employment, he laughed them off and just went with all the “shots” and then he turned to one of the workers and said, “Do you love your child?”  The guy kind of hesitated and stopped for a second and said, “Well, yes I love my child.”  My husband then said to him, “If you can imagine that little amount of love that you have with your one child, I have that multiplied by 10!  Why would I want to deny myself all of that love?”  He said the guy kind of stopped in his tracks for a minute and then was quiet.

IMG_0939

People in the world don’t realize why they do what they do.  Most people are on this hamster wheel of life, that just keeps spinning around and around and around.  With no real directions or destinations of getting anywhere in life.

They continue with life, doing what their parents did–get married, have 2.1 kids, what society has told them to do–goto college, find a job, work 9-5. It is a continuous wheel of never ending sameness.   They don’t really get anywhere they just kind of “blend” into society.

IMG_0953

Society doesn’t want you to go against the status quo—for fear of disrupting  it or creating disharmony.

One of my husbands favorite quotes is this:

“Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them.”

Henry David Thoreau

We want to live life to the fullest.  Having a large family has filled our life so full of love that it is indescribable. Now is that for everyone?  No, I don’t believe God has called everyone to have ten children.  God has called US to have ten children and love them and bring them up as unto the Lord.  We love our life, we love our crazyness, we love being together doing things together every moment that we can.

IMG_0814

Most every weekend and night is spent doing this…

 

 

IMG_0792

Children playing, being children.  Isn’t this what life should be all about?

IMG_0924

 

Letting our babies enjoy watching leaves float down the river.  Enjoying the simpleness of life.

IMG_0957

Whether you have a large family, or small family, or no family at all, get outside this fall and enjoy some of Gods natural beauty.  Find a local park and start exploring.  We have come across many beautiful scenic areas, just by visiting the different parks in our area.  Pack a lunch or take a dinner, just enjoy being outside spending good quality family time.  Be unplugged from the world get back to fun, talking, and  knowing your children or spouse.  Do things like you used to do before life got a hold of you?

So what are you going to do?  Are you going to jump back on that hamster wheel, or step off and start enjoying life with your family?

 

 

IMG_0965

Be simple, be basic, no big packing, no big fancy foods, just jump in the car, grab a diaper bag for little ones, some peanut butter sandwiches,  apples, and water.  That is all a person needs–simplicity.  Go have fun, enjoy, live life the way that God has intended you to.

IMG_0792

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

7 Comments

Posted in influencing others, positive living, self help

Tagged , , ,

The ugly side of beauty….

Posted on 08/05/2013 | 2 comments

Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it.

Confucius

Beauty….now there is a powerful word. If you ever ask a girl, any age, what they think is beautiful, most remarks will have something to do with being skinny and look like a certain celebrity.  If you ask them if they think themselves to be pretty, most of the time they will say no.  They want this or that changed about themselves. Where do we get that from??

There’s no denying that our media and culture are obsessed with women’s looks. Magazines have weekly features with names like “body watch” that criticize female celebrities for being too heavy or too thin. TV and movie stars showcase unrealistic body types that most girls can’t copy without hurting themselves. Ads tell girls that, with the right beauty products, they can get their hair or makeup just right.

But another big influence on our daughters lies with us.  How many times do we complain that we look too fat today or need to lose a few more pounds?  Do we complain about getting older, or look into the mirror in disgust?  I know as a woman, I am guilty of falling into that complaint trap of “Oh, I just need to lose a few more pounds until I can get into this or that.” Or I need some makeup before we go out to “perk” up my face.   How much of that is my daughters listening to?  All of it.

Sometimes it can be very hard to love yourself especially when you don’t think you are beautiful.  Everywhere you look we are sold the promise that if we are beautiful our lives would be so much better.  That we will make more money, have better status, and have everlasting happiness.  Is it possible that beauty is just an unending lie, just propaganda? Why is it that we are listening to an industry that is fueled by money in order for us to be more pretty?  We need to stop letting someone else tell us what we need to do to be more beautiful.   We need to find the beauty that is already there.

 Everyone has something unique and beautiful about them.

We need to do more of the things that we love, things we are good at, things we enjoy doing.  We need to put that smile on to bring instant beauty to our faces.  We need to stop funding the cosmetics companies with billions of dollars of sales money on cosmetics and beauty treatments, that are unsafe for us. (Take a look at the chemicals in beauty products, not on the labels as it won’t say anything, but do a google search, to see what type of cancer causing agent you are smearing on your faces and maybe your daughters lips everyday.)

Most importantly we need to take a look at what God says about our appearance and re-evaluate ourselves.

The Bible tells us that we need to take a different approach to appearance than fitting into society’s idea of beauty.

What God Finds Important

God doesn’t focus on our outward appearance. It is what’s on the inside that matters most to Him. The Bible tells us that God’s focus is on developing our inner beauty so that it can be reflected in everything we do and what we are.

1 Samuel 16:7 – “The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”

 

James 1:23 – “Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror.”

Unfortunately we do live in a superficial world where people do judge on appearance. We would all love to say that we are not in the majority, and that we all look beyond what’s on the outside, but virtually all of us are influenced by appearances.

Yet, we need to keep appearance in perspective. The Bible tells us that it is important to present ourselves as nicely as possible, but God does not call us to go to extremes. It is important that we remain aware of why we do the things we do to look good.

Ask yourself two questions:

Does your focus on your appearance take your eyes off the Lord?
Are you more focused on your weight, clothes, or makeup than you are on God?
If you answered, “Yes,” to either of the questions then you may need to take a closer look at your priorities. The Bible tells us to look closer at our hearts and actions rather than our presentation and appearance.

Colossians 3:17 – “And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.” (NIV)

 

Proverbs 31:30 – “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting: but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.”(NIV)

 

Are you this imperfect specimen that the advertising industry says you are or are you beautiful and just don’t know it.

2 Comments

Posted in influencing others, positive living, self help

Tagged ,

The difference a smile makes

Posted on 06/09/2013 | 2 comments


I had lots of errands to run today and had to take all 8 of my children with me. I was not looking forward to it, as it can get hectic. You never know if a child is going to have a meltdown right in the middle of the store. But thankfully, nothing of that caliber happened today. Despite being gone for over 6 hours all the children were good. It was very easy to smile and show the world that “yes, I am very happy with my life.”
But what if my day had gone quite differently? What if I had been annoyed with my children? What would I be saying to the world then? That I am no different and life is crappy. That is not what I want to do with my life. I want to be an influence, a positive one to others. How can I do that?
The answer is very simple……a smile. What a difference a smile makes.

Image00001

Each cashier that I came in contact with, did not look very happy. Most looked downright annoyed. Each and every one I had to interact with I made sure to ask them a question and address them by name with a smile. I would listen to their complaints and try and leave an encouraging response. Even my “in training” bagger I was sure to say what a great job she was doing and that the store was very fortunate to have such a hard worker like herself. That instantly put a smile on her face. Did it stay with her? I don’t know, but I hope that even though her day was going quite dimly, she might look back on that one word of positiveness and smile.

The bible says in Proverbs 17:22 A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.

A complaining spirit drains us emotionally and takes away our joy. It reflects pessimism, not optimism. But those who learn to think and speak about “‘praiseworthy things” have a joyful heart.
Try it today. Smile at your children more, let them know that Mom or Dad delights in them. How about your spouse, do they get to see a smile when they first walk in the door? How about the people you interact with at work? Its amazing what a little smile will do for a person’s soul.

Image00002

2 Comments

Posted in influencing others, positive living

Tagged , ,

Accountability

Posted on 05/06/2013 | 2 comments

The bible speaks of being accountable to one another, bearing each others burdens.  The world says accountability leads to success.  I believe both.  One of the reasons for writing this blog is to become accountable in my actions as a wife, mother, and manager of our home..  Its easy to say “yes, I always choose the right responses in my life,” but the reality is…I’m a fallen person who makes more mistakes than I’m willing to admit:-)

Accountability is essential for any society to function.  Whether it be in the workplace, in the church, or in our homes, we need people around us to help us achieve success in our lives.  Whether your a mom of small children just needing that reassurance that what your doing is worth it, or that person struggling with addiction, its important to have people around to encourage and lift us up.

Proverbs 27:17 says.

Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend.

I think that this verse basically means that we can learn from one another, be a teacher and an example to others, and help build each other up.  Its important in all things in life to know that your not alone in what you do, and somewhere in this world is another person feeling exactly like you do. It helps us to continue on, maybe remove some feelings of guilt, and help us to be better human beings in this world.

Are you fulfilling your role by being a sharpening influence to help make someone more useful and productive in life?  Do you value and promote relationships with other good people to help “perfect” your own walk in life, even if that means that their corrections might be hurtful at times?  I encourage you to let yourself get “sharpened” by someone today.

2 Comments

Posted in influencing others, positive living, self help

Tagged ,