Monthly Archives: February 2015

There are many ways that we can be offended. We are going to examine six of them.

•  Offended by the truth
•  Offended by God
•  Offended by trouble/circumstances
•  Offended by the holy spirit
•  Offending ourselves
•  Giving offenses to others

Offended by the truth

In John 8:32 it says: Then you will know the truth and the truth will set you free!!

When you start reading scriptures or you hear a truth from God’s word, if it doesn’t line up with us and our flesh, we have to be careful not to take offense with this. We usually are quick to think it is not for us but for someone else. But God’s word is for us. To help us be free in Him.

I remember very much when God’s word—the truth—was teaching me how to change things about myself. I thought in my own mind that I was a pretty good person (smile) But I realized I had a lot of hidden attitudes and heart issues to work on. There was more than one time that I felt like I didn’t want to do this. God was showing me how I had prideful, control issues. I wanted to take charge and fix things. I wanted to do things my way, because I thought it was best (smile) He was showing me that I was a manipulator, and that I had to stop feeling sorry for myself. I had to let down my guard and humble myself before my family and God. It was tough. But I kept on it. It was stretching me.

I don’t know about you, but I know that when I am stretching it just doesn’t feel comfortable. But just as a caterpillar stretches it’s way out of the cocoon and into a butterfly, that is the same metamorphosis that we go through. When we are stretched, it may feel a little uncomfortable but that is where we are able to push through and enter into the next level of what God has for us.

God can use anyone in any situation that He wants. BUT how much greater of a way can God use us when we completely lay down all of our “stuff” and let Him take control of our lives?

When we hear the truth, for the most part it is hard on the flesh. We are sinful people and when we hear something that goes against what the world has taught us, then it is tough. But it reaps many good things, unlike the world. When we hear the truth and act upon it, it sets our present conditions into line with God and it prepares us for far greater blessings that we can imagine. We want to be moving forward in our walk with the Lord. We don’t want to stay stagnant. How much better is a life that is lived to the fullest just by laying aside our pride and becoming meek and submissive to what God has for us? For most, they make excuses of why they don’t want to change or don’t want to hear that truth. All those excuses are doing nothing but preventing them from moving forward. We want to be FREE!!! We want to be free so that God can use us in a mighty way.

Offended by God

One look at the world and you can see how people take offense at God. Our society is offended by God. The ten commandments posted on a building offends people who look at it. Allowing students to pray in school causes offense to others. Why does this offend them? The ONLY reason it offends them is because THEY DO NOT WANT TO DO IT! They have rejected the One whom has created them, and therefore they reject anything about Him. It is called rebellion and our world is full of it. When you read the 10 commandments, I think almost everyone can agree that they are all good rules to live by. To not kill, not to covet, not to be adulterous are all things that benefit US. God is trying to show US how to have a better life. Everything He says is for our good. But as the bible says in the end times they will rebel and turn their hearts away from the truth.

Offended by trouble/circumstances

Mark 4:14-17
The sower soweth the word. And these are they by the way side, where the word is sown; but when they have heard, Satan cometh immediately, and taketh away the word that was sown in their hearts. And these are they likewise which are sown on stony ground; who, when they have heard the word, immediately receive it with gladness; And have no root in themselves, and so endure but for a time: afterward, when affliction or persecution ariseth for the word’s sake, immediately they are offended.

This truth is an important one, you see it happening everyday especially in our churches. If someone is not deeply rooted in God’s word, when trouble comes, they fall away. This is a big testimony that I know I have encountered many times throughout my life. I see wives and teenagers that grew up in the church and when something happens badly in their lives, instead of digging deep into God’s word and turning to Him for strength and guidance, they crumble and fade away. It is a sad reality. But God’s word tells us about it so that we can be aware and be careful not to do it.
When we are faced with trials or bad situations they can either make us stronger or they will make us resentful. When bad things happen, if we take offense at the situation we start to blame others for it. We may blame God for disrupting our cushy lifestyles. We may even blame the devil—and that is rightly so. But we can also take offense at other people who seem to be more blessed then we are. Sometimes it is just resentment. That resentment takes root to form bitterness towards life and the situations that come our way. But we must be made aware of resentment. This is part of not taking offense.
When we are faced with these trials or bad situations we need to look at them from a whole new perspective. We need to think, that by going through this, it can actually helps us get deeper and stronger roots in the Word. I know for myself, when I have gone through trials, the more I was alone and away from others I had only one person to hang onto, and that was God. But during those times is when my faith was strengthened. I realized that once I gave over my situations to Him, He could do far greater of a job then I could do. Then to watch it unfold, strengthened my faith hugely. Seeing His hand do the things that for years I tried to control and change.
When times of trial arise you can really see how faithful you truly are to God. You can see if you are more of an emotional person or if you are truly committed to the faith. Emotional hearers of the word always fall apart during times of trial. You have seen people being unstable in times of trial. They get angry and make accusations against others, instead of rationally looking at the situation.. This is only a sign of spiritual immaturity. Not that you can’t get emotional during times of trial—but what I am saying is that inside, your faith will help you stand the test of your trials. Knowing that God is in control of everything and that he will work ALL things out together for your good. Being careful to guard, to not let your emotions take charge of your faith.
As a side note, you want to avoid people in life that are given to change. However the wind blows through their life that is how they bend, sway, and react. These types of people you cannot count on. They usually have a bad influence and it is just better to stay away.

When bad things or situations happen in your life don’t blame God.

Lamentations 3:25-28 says that God lays the yoke of divine discipline on us for our benefits. Sometimes it is good for us to experience disappointment. We learn to just shake off the dirt, get back up and go on. We learn not to place our hope in things but to place our hope in God. When we don’t get our way all of the time, we learn to appreciate things much more. We grow very thankful for the things that we do have.

God is at work ALL OF THE TIME. Just like on a movie, we only see what is going on right here and now. But God is working behind the scenes and we know nothing about what He is doing behind the scenes. We must trust God and NEVER accuse Him of not caring for you. God is good all of the time—I like to say “no, God is GREAT!!”

Being offended by the Holy Spirit??  REALLY, who in their right mind would want to offend the Holy Spirit?? Find out tomorrow….

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Offenses

This is Satan’s ultimate plan for destruction of love, purpose, and your happiness.

People get offended about all kinds of things:

•  We get offended when our husband don’t recognize our need for a break.
•  We get offended when someone at church doesn’t talk to us.
•  We get offended when someone else is chosen to lead a ministry.
•  We get offended when we aren’t invited to a ladies group.
•  We get offended when our children don’t do what we ask them.
•  Some of us even get offended at God.

Yes, I did say that. How many of us complain when we don’t get what WE want out of life? How many are angry at their situation? How many get mad because they are “stuck” with a no good husband? How about angry that your van isn’t as nice as your best friends? How about if you even get a little upset at God because He didn’t answer your prayers the way you wanted?

One of the biggest stumbling blocks to being completely free in life is to not take offense.

Ohhh, those are touchy topics and sounds like a lot of negativity!!! It is hard to go through things and think it just isn’t fair that you have to do them. I haven’t gone through as much as some people have in life, but I have gone through trials. There were many times, I was angered at God and other people for my “lot” in life. But you know, none of that mattered. None of it hurt anyone but ME. I was the one that suffered with anger and built up frustration. It only led to me taking offense the next time I ran into someone and they said something that “rubbed me the wrong way.” I just kept building little offenses over and over until they built into a big one and then some unfortunate person would get the brunt of it. Most of the time it was my husband and children. Then I would pray and ask God to help me rid myself of my anger, but it would keep coming back. What was I doing wrong??
The bible says in Matthew 5:24 that we are to leave our gifts at the altar and then go and be reconciled to our brothers FIRST and then come back and offer our gifts. Do you think God wants us to FIRST get rid of our offense so that we can worship Him freely ? Yes He does. Then, He can accept our worship and listen to our prayers and answer them.
But what if you say that you don’t actually “hate” someone you are just offended by them? You may be right. Offenses by themselves are generally not anger, hurt feelings, or resentment. But what happens is those annoyances and irritations have the unfortunate ability to build into grudges. These usually lead to sins that a person has allowed themselves to be led into. The sad part is that it is usually done by the persons own mind. After some time your heart has become hardened and anger takes root. You may not think of it as anger but that is what it is called.

And then shall many be offended, and shall betray one another, and shall hate one another.
Matthew 24:10

This is a sign of the end times. It says that MANY WILL BE OFFENDED. They will distrust and desert those they should obey. They will stumble and fall away.

There is a greater attack from the enemy than any other time in history.

If Satan can keep us angry, verse 12 of Matthew says that the LOVE OF PEOPLE WILL GROW COLD.
This is what we need to be on the watch for. Offenses are strings that add up over and over again. When we see someone whom we have offense at, we may not think that it doesn’t matter, but what it is doing is causing our love to grow cold. It causes our hearts to shut out the goodness and blessing that God has for us. If we truly want to be free and live the life to the fullest then we need to stop taking offense.

Up next, learn the types of offense and how you can be offended….there may be more than you think (smile)

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After moving down to the south, my husband kept saying, “you should embrace some southern recipes.”  Now knowing my husband, he was referring to deep fried foods.  I even saw deep fried pickles at the store?? Interesting. Well as a wife who cares of her husbands health,  I avoid deep fried anything.  But I noticed that they sell collard greens very inexpensively at the stores.  I started looking up collard green recipes.  I came across multiple soup recipes and have tried a few, but I came up with my own rendition and this suits us great.

The first one we did contained northern beans and it looked like this.

What I did for this recipe, was to fill a pot up with chicken stock.  If you don’t have that you can use bouillon cubes and water mixed together.  I added an onion chopped up as well as a few spoonfuls of minced garlic.  I let this come to a full boil and then added my 2 cans of northern beans.  For my thickener, I added mashed potato flakes.  I add a cup at a time, until my favorite consistency.    I then added one bunch of collard greens, that I chopped up into bite sized chunks.  I let it simmer another 1/2 hour and then served it.

When I served this, I sprinkled some parmesan cheese over it. I enjoyed it very much, but my children were less than thrilled.  Especially with all the new “green” stuff.  I had to switch it up a bit.

I came up with this:

I started out with the same pot of chicken stock, added an onion, few scoops of garlic and a package of mixed frozen vegetables.  I let that cook for about 20 minutes.  I then added some beans, I actually had Garbanzo beans on hand and added those.  Whatever you enjoy.  We cut up some smoked sausage and added that as well.  I did the same thing for the thickener—used potato flakes. But I mixed it with some milk before I added it.  Equal amounts—-2 cups milk, 2 cups potato flakes—then whisk it in.   I added pepper this time, to make it a little more spicy.  After at a good consistency I added a package of cut up collard greens.  I put in the entire big bag.

This made a big batch of soup, I was able to freeze it into containers for later on.  I actually got the collard greens cheaply,because they were going bad, so I made soup that day and froze it for later.  Whenever we want soup, we just heat and serve.

I have found that my children actually enjoy this kind.  Yes, I have those that still dislike the collard greens, but most of them will eat the majority of their soup.  It is a keeper and a new regular rotation in our food menu.

We have been moving right along in our decluttering series.  I pray that this is the year that you will FINALLY conquer clutter in your home.

If you bought the book, you are probably moving at your own pace and that is awesome, you can use these posts as extra motivation or for more ideas.

This week will probably be a little more easier.  We are going to focus on your hallways and closets.  Don’t include bathroom closets or bedroom closets we will do those at a later time.  Work on your entryways or coat closets, that sort of thing.

Take a look at your hallway….what sort of things do you have in it? Maybe you have a table that you drop your keys on when you arrive home and that is good.  As long as it is the designated place that you drop your keys every time.  If it is a place that you put them on but then later find out that someone has moved them, you need to find a new place.  Designate an area that you ALWAYS put your keys and purse on.  If you do it each and every time you will form a habit and it will stick.  This prevents much needed searching for keys when you need to head out the door.

If you have any type of coat closets, you will be weeding those out today.  Take everything out of the closet and set it on the floor.  Wipe the interior of your closet and sweep the floors.  Now you are going to take an inventory of what needs to go back in this closet.  Will this be the central location for everyone’s coats?  Then keep one coat per person.  If it is a dress coat, or one that is worn occasionally…hang it in the bedroom.  If you have too many, get rid of some.  For children I recommend keeping one coat for each child.  When we had cold winters, we kept 2 coats per child.  One was for play, one was for going out in.  We keep one light jacket for children as well.  If your closet is stuffed full, than that means you have TOO MANY THINGS in it.  You need to weed it out some more.  Unless you have an extra large family then a closet SHOULD fit everyone’s coats comfortably.  If you have a large family, you might consider having a coat bar rack made.

For the floor, it will probably hold shoes.  I would recommend buying a shoe rack to hold multiple pairs of shoes.  You can get various holders that are inexpensive and they hold many pairs of shoes.  Look into that.  Don’t be a hoarder of shoes.  Keep only a few pairs per person.  We keep a pair of everyday shoes, pair of hiking shoes, a pair of church shoes, and flip flops/sandals for each child.  As they get older they like to have multiple pairs, but those are their responsibility to keep cleaned up.  As a mom that is in charge, I keep it simple for the ones I am responsible for.  For myself, I keep 2 pairs of boots.  A nicer pair and an everyday pair to wear.  I have a few pairs of sandals for warmer weather and a pair of hiking shoes.  I keep them my wardrobe color of brown and then they go with everything.

What else is in your closet?  Are there things that do not belong in here?  Put them where they go.  Old decorations or miscellaneous items?  Consider putting them in your donation box.  Keep only what you need, get rid of the rest.  You should have some room in your closet, it should not be stuffed full.  If it is, go back through your items and weed out again.

up next part 7

For those that enjoy a video, here is one on closets.

This is the last part of our series, we have been working hard to remove toxic thinking from our brains to make our minds healthy.  By having our minds free from negativity that  in turn pours out into our lives by making our actions as God would have them.  It is hard for the Lord to work through us and be “in us” if He has to work around all of the “toxic” things in our minds.  I am not saying he cannot—-I am saying, if we line ourselves up with the word of God and do as he commands us, the spirit is allowed to flow through us, without our own thoughts to question things.

Today we are working on being ABLE.  Able to trust God enough to remove the toxic thoughts from our memories.

I know that facing your toxic memories will require courage.  It will require that you trust that Jesus CAN and WILL heal your forgiving heart.  For myself, that meant forgiving others who had wronged me in the past.  I had a situation when I was a child where I was abused and taken advantage of.  Something no child, who is helpless, should have to go through.  I know that in the midst of crying out to “anyone to help” I wasn’t receiving it.  For a child to grow up through that, Satan love that it affected every walk of my life.  Through my teen age years,  I was rebellious and angered. I did things my way, and was always “looking” for that love that I didn’t have.  For years it affect me through bouts of depression.  I wouldn’t be able to explain it, but a few times a year, it would replay over in my mind again and again.  Usually it happened because someone offended me and I took it to heart.  This in turn relayed back to when I was a child and the hurt I experienced.  My toxic thinking was triggered from memories as a child.

Over the years I have talked with others who had similar experiences and I saw how their bitterness and anger would affect every area of their lives. I saw their marriages crumble. I would see them repeat the same mistakes in their own children as their parents did with them. I would see how they harbored that unforgiveness and hurt inside.  It was hard to talk about, they cried when reliving the memories.  I saw how harboring those toxic thoughts hurt my own marriage and situations in mylife, I didn’t want any part of that.

When I became a believer in the Lord Jesus, I just wanted to grab onto the love that He was offering.  So I did.  I was thankful to have someone explain to me about forgiving others and how past hurts would put wounds in my soul and that would deter my ability to do the Lords work effectively.  So I worked on it.  I would confront each and every wound that I had.  It was hard.  It is hard forgiving others who don’t deserve forgiveness.

Often a toxic memory is exposed when you are faced in a situation and your brain immediately reminds you of a memory when something negatively was spoken or done to you.  As soon as you are reminded of that “wound” you need to speak repentance and forgiveness for those situations.  I KNOW ITS HARD!! ITS NOT FAIR!!  BUT IT MUST BE DONE!!!  If you want to truly live your lives free from Satan, you CANNOT let him have any part of your life.

Satan would love nothing better than to watch me as a child experience what I had gone through, and then watch me through my teen years, falling deeper and deeper into sin and depression.  He loved every moment of it, because he was winning.  As a woman who has been completely free of depression and toxic hurts and unforgivness, that is when he can no longer hurt me.  I am thankful that at 39 years of age, God is using me to minister to others who have gone through hurts in their lives.  By speaking out and sharing my past and how I went through healing makes Satan go back to the corner he belongs in.  He no longer has any part of my life, I don’t allow him.  He isn’t worth any of it.  I found my peace and my freedom in Jesus.

As you are working and allowing God to replace your toxic memories of your past with something good and redemptive in your mind, Satan will try to keep bringing it up over and over again.  But the more that you are ABLE to push through and keep denouncing his power in your life, the further he goes away.  I can honestly say, God has erased a lot of my memory from my past.  Things that I know I don’t need to dwell on or think about.  He has healed my mind and I don’t ever think about those bad things anymore.  It is a freeing feeling—let me tell you!!  But it took time.  BUT GOD IS ABLE!!  My favorite verse is Ephesians 3:20:

Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us

God IS able to do things, but it begins with US.  We have to allow Him access to ALL of our life.  We need to have the FAITH that He will bring you through and out of your troubles.  He did it for me and I KNOW He will do it for you!!!

If you don’t allow yourself to confront your past pain and then turn your heart for right judgment, you WILL NOT be able to get rid of the negativity in your brain.  You HAVE to face the reality of your emotional pain so that you can FORGIVE those who brought it on you.  WHEN you do those things, you WILL receive the healing from the Lord.

This was something that really helped me realize the magnitude of forgiveness.  If you insist on holding on to your toxic memory, then you will not be able to fully experience what you have been forgiven of.  By allowing yourself to remain imprisoned of your toxic memories you are rejecting the sacrifice that Jesus died on the cross for.  He has paid the penalty of our sins. For myself, it was scary to think that if I didn’t forgive others, how could God forgive me??

And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.

Mark 11:25

Don’t shut the door!!

Some of us grew up thinking we got the short end of the stick.  Maybe you grew up impoverished, or were at a disadvantage then others around you due to circumstances.  As you grow into adulthood, these toxic memories may compel you to do whatever it takes to never experience that again.  You will intentionally align yourself with others of similar wordly goals and avoid anyone who questions your motives in light of God’s word.  If you do not deal with, and remove that toxic memory from your past you will find it very difficult, if not impossible, to trust God for anything.  Especially provisions. As a parent, you will dote on your children and give into their every demand.  Through your life your toxic memories will cause you to hang around people that will not confront you.  You will never have any real relationships with people that want to help you overcome past hurts so that you can be free.  You will feel very judged if anyone offers help and grow offensive towards them, because you need no help.  You will close the door on God’s blessing because you will constantly feel like the world is judging you.  This all stems from past hurts.  We need to let them go.

Jesus is the ONLY source for your determination to NOT let your thoughts become fear-based as they enter your brain.  EACH AND EVERY thought MUST be taken captive as it enters your brain.

If you feel like you have worked on your unforgiveness and offenses in your brain then when a situation comes up and you start to feel that anger, immediately dump that thought.  Turn to the scriptures that you have worked at memorizing to get rid of that thought.  Don’t allow Satan any part of your life.  He will try, but we do not have to allow him.

Align yourself with the commands of God that are found in the bible.  His love is at work IN and THROUGH you.  We are to OBEY His commands because they are intricately connected to our well being.

We want to live a life of freedom in Him.  That all begins with aligning EVERY part of our being with Him.  Our minds are connected with our hearts. We speak what is in our hearts.  Our hearts need to be filled with love.  That love can only come from the Lord.  Remove the toxic thinking and put in Gods’ word which is love.

I pray that this has been an encouraging series and that you have begun working on remove toxic thinking from your life.  I know that you WILL experience the difference in your life by being completely free from toxicity.  Be blessed.