When do boys become Christian men? and large family birthday

Almost every culture has a special “rite of passage” for when boys become men.  Some may have them take a special journey on their own, some may have them go on a hunt, some might have a special ceremony.  But when in our Christian America do we decide when our boys become men?

Some boys might think it is when they get their drivers license, when they turn 18, when they are allowed to “date” a girl or maybe when they leave home.

But in reality there is no real special moment of transition for a boy. This leads to many insecurities in today’s boys.   Most boys  go about life and try and “prove” their manhood by doing senseless things as directed by our society.  They get involved in gangs, destructive behavior, or take a girl to bed….all to try and “prove” their manhood.

What can we as parents do to show our boys true maturity in manhood?  You and I both know that there is NO real secret formula or a magic pill that will make them leap over to manhood perfectly.  We all know that the answer lies with God.  God MUST be at work in our young man’s lives AND be at work in us as parents, helping  train and guide our young men.

True maturity is spiritual.  It is wisdom in knowing God and his will, and being able to carry it out in your life.  Proverbs 1 :1-7 says

The proverbs of Solomon the son of David, king of Israel:
2 To know wisdom and instruction,
To perceive the words of understanding,
3 To receive the instruction of wisdom,
Justice, judgment, and equity;
4 To give prudence to the simple,
To the young man knowledge and discretion—
5 A wise man will hear and increase learning,
And a man of understanding will attain wise counsel,
6 To understand a proverb and an enigma,
The words of the wise and their riddles.
7 The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge,
But fools despise wisdom and instruction.

Everyone has free will, we as parents can only seek the Lord with our whole heart and ask for wisdom.  We can do much planting and watering the seeds of God in helping mold our boys to manhood.

So, what are some practical things that we can do as parents.  We can help our boys grow in areas like:

  1. Knowledge of the contents of the Bible.
    1. knowing bible history
    2. knowing main themes of biblical books
    3. know books of the bible in order.
    4. read the bible all the way through.
    5. understand how biblical teachings center around Christ
  2. Knowledge of the major teachings of the Bible.
    1. be able to describe in words doctrine and respond to questions in using your own words.
  3. Memorization of selected passages and scriptures of the Bible.
  4. Personal relationship to the Lord.
    1. Using devotional material
    2. prayer diary
    3. participate in fasting and retreats
    4. growth in understanding of means for overcoming sin
  5. Projects of service
    1. helping serve the needy
    2. devote time to serving in church
  6. Wisdom in dealing with various spheres of life.
    1. finances–tithing, budget, investing, balancing a bank account
    2. etiquette– table etiquette, greeting etiquette, letter etiquette, conversational etiquette, sexual etiquette.
    3. Apologetics– answering questions and objections about Christian faith; understanding the Christian world view and the main competing worldviews and ideas in the United States.
    4. Sexuality: knowing Christian teaching and standards for thoughts and actions. Understanding how God designed male and female bodies

This list is extensive and not something that you approach overnight, it is something that you take years to help grow and develop your young boy into a godly manhood.

I pray that each of you reading this seeks the Lord in guidance and has a good support group when helping raise your godly young man.

For my “young man,”  he has turned 14 this past week.  Growing up before our eyes.  He has started to take over big brother’s jobs like cutting the grass.


Here he was for the first time, doing the yard.

For his birthday, we went to Yates Cider Mill for our annual trail walk.


I call it the country for city folks.  My husband and I have been going here since we dated and have taken our children, almost every fall since.  It used to be less crowded, but now since more are desiring to experience “nature” we find it is quite busy when we go.  IMG_20140921_154531

We usually go off of the main trail and take a lesser walked path down towards the water.  The children enjoy “exploring” and finding a new path.  IMG_20140921_154556

Here is Evan, showing his “age.”IMG_20140921_155447

The men walking along the path.  It is rather pretty when the leaves start changing color, we just went early this year.IMG_20140921_161500

We used to get all of the children’s pictures in front of this, but I could only get the little ones to pose.


Then it was home for dinner.  Evan loves fish.  We made some salmon and tilapia fish broiled. Curly fries and corn.  He was a happy camper.IMG_20140921_200900

For dessert we did ice cream sandwich dessert.  Simple, yet delicious:

Layer the following in 9 x 13 pan:

  • 1 box ice cream sandwiches
  • 1/2 carton cool whip
  • hot fudge and caramel sauce
  • candy toffee bits
  • 1 box ice cream sandwiches
  • 1/2 carton cool whip
  • hot fudge and caramel sauce drizzled
  • top with remainder of toffee bits


Place in freezer until firm.  So good.  You can vary it by using different flavored ice cream sandwiches or candy pieces. Evan chose banana split.

Here he was “showing up” his sister in his height.  Unfortunately my 16 year old is not very tall and he used to be the same height for a long time, now he has surpassed her.  Sorry Lauren.IMG_20140921_202459

My prayer for you Evan is that you grow up seeking the Lord and finding His path for your life.  You have many wonderful gifts that God has bestowed upon you, and I am excited to see those turn to fruition. You are a gentle, kind, and considerate young man with a bright future ahead of you.  I love you so much.

Happy 14th Birthday Evan!!!

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