The challenge: to subtract people/things that deduct from your life
Okay, we ALL have them….people and things that take WAY too much unnecessary time from our lives. It may be time spent finding out what is going on, on Facebook, it might be long, negative phone conversations spent with friends, or it could be sitting in front of the television watching the “new” series that came out. We all have things in our life that are basically “deducting” from precious time that could be spent in a more positive area.
Why make the change:
How many of us “wish” that we had more time to do things?
I know I make excuses from time to time that say,”if only I had more time, or I would but I can’t seem to fit it into my day.” Then some of my “free” time is spent “relaxing” in front of the tv or spent sitting listening to people complain about life.
Now nothing is WRONG with talking and encouraging friends that may be going through a rough time, or even watching a show, I am talking about the things that are constantly time consuming, drain us of emotional energy, and are generally not a “positive” light in our life.
It is so easy to keep adding friends and things into our life. We are constantly handed new opportunities to minister, new friends that seem generally okay to hang out with, and many commitments that sound like great opportunities for our children. But not everything NEEDS to be added to our life.
If you are finding that you are emotionally drained after visiting with a friend, stressed out trying to get to prior commitments and most importantly your spouse does not view your friends or your desire to fill your schedules full as good, it is time to subtract things.
How to make the change:
I know myself, I have had people come into my life that are generally not adding benefits to it. Not that people have to “add” but you can get wrapped up in “saving” people or letting them unleash their problems more times than needed. It is a fine line and something that needs to be put through to God first.
These people could be family, best friends, or even co-workers. If you are finding that the majority of your time with these people results in negative behavior because of their lifestyle choices, or maybe they constantly like to complain and bring negativity into your life thus resulting in you being negative yourself. It may be time to subtract.
Now, we can’t always just drop people, although some may beg to differ. You can subtract people from your life without severing all ties. Sometimes it can mean less time talking to them, or finding other avenues that you can pour your time into like say time with your children.
Sometimes it is commitments and a full schedule that need to be subtracted from our lives. I know when I fill my days full and barely have time to sit and talk with my husband each evening, he gets frustrated. If I am running around here and there not being a “keeper at home” then how can I show my children the value of what God has called me to be? Activities are fun to do, don’t get me wrong, but you have to find that balance of what is God-honoring and family-honoring.
You shouldn’t be going through life on the hamster wheel, constantly running here and there because you are going to miss some really great things that only come from having some quiet, relaxing time. Your children, your spouse, and you deserve to be able to enjoy just doing nothing but being with each other.
I want my children to learn that you don’t always have to be doing something to be happy. I want them to value friendships in the way that it is better to have a few really good ones then lots of broken, stressed out, emotional taking ones.
The best ways to decide which people, commitments, or activities to subtract from your life is to seek God in prayer. Ask Him to show you which ones are deducting from your life in a negative way. Go to your husband and ask him if there are any activities, people, or commitments that he sees as unhealthy in your life.
That could be a hard thing to do. We are generally people pleasers and to feel like you let someone down will be hard to do. But life is too short, we need to be adding positive things and people to our life not keeping the ones that deduct from it.